


Missing Christmas

by KatieComma



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Christmas, Established Relationship, First Christmas Together, Fluff, M/M, cuteness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:08:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28305075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatieComma/pseuds/KatieComma
Summary: Steve and Sam are on the way back from a mission for Christmas. Steve had been hoping to spend it at home.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson
Comments: 6
Kudos: 27





	Missing Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for the beta read Orianess!
> 
> I don't know when this is set... sometime after they get the Avengers compound and put the team together, but before Civil War? I guess?

The Quinn jet flew fast, but the ride was gentle. Nat was at the wheel at her insistence, guiding them home: back to the Avengers compound. Sam leaned on the console next to her, making soft conversation. The sound of their voices travelled back to Steve, if not the words.

Rhodey had unsuited and left his armour hanging in its bay near the back of the plane. He sat with his eyes closed, head leaned back against his headrest.

It had a been a tough mission. Dark. One of those missions that made Steve really wonder how he could see so much goodness in humanity some days.

Vision and Wanda were off in a corner together, talking. Vision seemed to be good at soothing Wanda’s worst emotions when things were bad. It was good, that they could lean on each other. Not that Vision needed to lean on anybody, and yet he seemed to give that gift to Wanda. He relaxed around her a little, and made himself comfortable in a way that Steve didn’t see with anyone else.

He was watching them when Sam came over and sat beside him. It really had been a bad mission if he hadn’t been paying enough attention to catch the end of Sam’s conversation with Nat, and his footsteps across the metal jet floor.

“You got that look on your face,” Sam said softly, settling in close, their knees and shoulders bumping comfortably.

Steve couldn’t help the little smile that crossed his face. “What look?”

“The one that says you’re thinkin’ too much,” Sam said. “And worryin’ too much.”

Steve let his muscles relax a little against the bench, leaning into Sam. “Somebody has to do the thinking around here,” he joked, elbowing Sam playfully.

Sam laughed. And it was warm and deep and just what Steve needed.

“Man that’s good,” Steve said aloud without thinking.

Sam looked at him, but didn’t have to ask what he meant. Steve had told him how much he liked his laugh when they were in private.

“So, what’s on your mind then?” Sam asked, his warm deep brown eyes searching Steve’s. His fingers twitched in his lap, and Steve knew that Sam wanted to reach out and touch him or hold him. But they’d never crossed that barrier around the rest of the team. Sometimes at an event, like a big birthday or one of Tony’s parties, they’d share a brief touch here or there, but never while they were still suited up and on the jet.

Steve didn’t want to talk about the mission. He was tired of it. It was over, in the past, and sure parts of it might haunt him, but he couldn’t hang on to it. So he brought up the other thing he’d been dwelling on.

“We’re missing Christmas,” Steve said. It sounded stupid when he said it out loud. Petulant. But there was so much more behind it. There was years and years of having no one to celebrate with. Including years before he’d gone in the ice when his family had been gone. It was the first time in too long that Steve felt like he had someone to celebrate with. And not just the team. Because the team was family, and they always did a little something at Christmas. But he was still Captain America for them, even at those events. But to have a Christmas at home, with just him and Sam, where he could relax and be himself. They’d bought a tree and decorated it together. Sam had traditions from his family that he’d wanted to share: drinking eggnog in the morning and ripping open presents together still in their pyjamas.

But Steve didn’t have to say any of it out loud, Sam’s face crumpled a little and he understood. “I know,” he said softly. “We can do it as soon as we get home. Postpone Christmas.”

Steve smiled, but it felt a little hollow. It wouldn’t be the same, and they both knew it.

They still had to get back to the Avengers compound, and then drive down to the city where they’d set up Christmas in Steve’s Brooklyn apartment. By Steve’s calculation they were going to get back to the apartment early on December 26th.

“We aren’t missing Christmas Steve,” Sam said softly. It was the voice he usually reserved for their time alone. “Christmas is happening right now. No matter where we are. It’s going on. The world is still spinning just like it always is. And you know what? We’re together for it. So that’s a win in my book.”

Steve smiled, always amazed by Sam’s upbeat outlook. He landed a soft, loving little play-punch on Sam’s thigh.

“And I may have prepared for this inevitability,” Sam said with a raised eyebrow before he got up and went into the locker full of their gear. He came back with a little present, wrapped in bright paper with a crushed bow on top.

“Had to put it in my bag,” Sam said with a shrug. “Wrapping didn’t hold up like I’d hoped.”

Steve turned the little present over in his hands, overcome with happiness and love for the man beside him.

“Well, what are you waitin’ on?” Sam checked his watch. “It’s Christmas day. Ain’t no better time.”

“I didn’t get you anything,” Steve said.

“Yeah you did,” Sam said. “I checked that tree before we left. And there was a ton of stuff under there from you. And I’m not the one who’s worried about not doing Christmas on Christmas day. I’ll wait for presents.”

“But I should have-” Steve was cut off by music softly humming out of the Quinn jet’s interior speakers. Tony had made sure it had a great sound system.

Sam chuckled immediately, obviously knowing the song. But Steve had to listen for a minute until a soft-voiced woman sang: “All I want for Christmas is you” in a throaty soprano.

Nat shot him a wink over her shoulder before she turned her attention back to her flight path.

“I’m serious about you openin’ that damn gift,” Sam said. “If you don’t I’m gonna take it away.”

Steve smiled at him and pulled off the ribbon before he tore into the paper. There was a small box inside, and he opened it to reveal a shiny piece of etched silver; a tree ornament. He picked it up by its green ribbon and held it up in the light. It was old fashioned, and looked like something Steve might have bought for his parents back in the day, not that he could have afforded something so nice. The letters etched in fancy script on the front read: “Our First Christmas Together” with the year underneath. There were little holly leaves around the edges, and a wreath at the top.

“Turn it over,” Sam said softly.

Steve flipped it around to see their names etched together on the back. Just a simple: “Steve and Sam.”

Christmas music continued to play softly in the background, and Steve realized that Sam was right. They were together and that was all that mattered. Even if they weren’t in front of a tree opening gifts, it was still their first Christmas together, and Sam was all the gift he really needed.

“That’s the handsome smile I know and love,” Sam said.

Steve set the ornament carefully back into the box and put the lid on. Then he turned to Sam, grabbed the back of his neck to pull him in and kissed him. It wasn’t soft and chaste, but it wasn’t obscene either. It had the perfect warm pressure of a committed relationship. Two men who know how they fit together without thinking about it.

Steve had finally crossed the boundary he’d very plainly set, and he didn’t care at all. Because it felt right. And it was Christmas damn it.

He clutched the box tightly in his hand, let Sam put an arm around his shoulders, and settled in to sleep for a little while.


End file.
